By Karen Schlaegel whose mum died from bowel cancer in 2017
My mum had her first cancer diagnosis in 2012. After an operation and treatment, she was cancer free for some years. In 2016 the cancer had come back and had already spread. It quickly became clear that any further treatment would only be palliative. She spent her last four weeks in hospice – as had always been her wish. During those four weeks, her health deteriorated rapidly. She died a few days after her 71st birthday. I was 37 at the time.
Here are the Five Things that comforted me after her death:
Karen Schlaegel and her mum
1. Precious last moments
Having been able to spend time with her during her last few weeks and being able to say goodbye. Those were also the toughest moments of my life so far but I appreciate that not everyone gets the chance.
2. Moments of lightness
Despite the dire situation during her last weeks at the hospice to still share a laugh with her, to experience a certain ease during such a challenging time.
3. Love and connection
Experiencing how much my mum was loved and how many lives she had touched was a great source of comfort.
4. The kindness of strangers
A word, a gesture, holding space for my grief – it meant so much to me, especially as it came from unexpected places and counterbalanced the awkwardness of other interactions.
5. Her last wish fulfilled
She passed away the way she always wished for. In her last couple of weeks, she was getting impatient and I felt that she was ready to go and that she chose her moment.
About Karen Schlaegel
As a life coach, Karen supports her clients in gaining a deeper understanding of themselves, becoming more self-aware, reaching a new level of clarity and moving towards creating and achieving their personal goals. Her other passion is writing. You can find her published articles and monthly blogposts on her website and for her daily musings, visit her on Instagram.
